“Oh no, not again,” I thought to myself while scrolling through Twitter late one afternoon.
Each one different from the last — a different setting, different outfit, and above all, a different version of what I think is a smile.
Despite these differences, there is a common denominator among all of them — it’s President Jay Golden.
Ever since Golden took over as the president of Wichita State in 2019, I have been keeping tabs on him. I am a student who wants change, and I believe Golden is the man for the job.
But I’m not here to discuss Golden’s involvement in student life or his accomplishments — I’m here to discuss his inability to take a decent selfie.
On Dec. 5, 2019, the first account of Golden’s unusual selfies emerged. Scrolling through my twitter feed that day intently watching for live updates of the Shocker basketball game against Central Arkansas, I stumbled upon Golden’s tweet, posing with the Director of the School of Music, Aleks Sternfeld-Dunn, and the pep band, Shocker Sound.
Lo and behold, the first selfie.
His face sat in the lower left corner, unveiling a half-cringed smile that brought me to tears of laughter. I wasn’t surprised. It’s a typical boomer selfie. Then again, maybe he was distracted by the crowd and forgot to use his face. Happens to everyone. So I ignored his questionable facial expression and went on with my day.
And then it happened again.
On December 17, I saw a familiar face on my twitter feed. But this time, it was different. Golden wasn’t surrounded by a large group of people. Instead he was alone, snapping yet another selfie of him and his new office. No distractions and his smile was a worse attempt than the last.
Since December, his streak of selfies has now reached a grand total of 17 and counting. I assumed he would’ve gotten better, or at least tried. Nonetheless, they’re still bad.
Well you’re in luck Mr. Golden. Coming from a photographer with nine years of experience, I have some helpful tips to make your selfie game immaculate.
Landscape mode is always an option
Upon review of the pictures you’ve taken, most, if not all of them, are vertical. This method makes it difficult to fit everything within the frame of your phone. Simply turning your phone 90 degrees to the left or right gives you more room to fit you and your subject(s) in the photo. No more scrunched bodies! During a pandemic, this tip makes it easier for people to social distance and make it in your selfie. Not to mention, it looks better on Twitter!
2. For the love of God, lower your phone
Jay, there is no reason for your phone to be that high. Instead, put it at eye level to improve your pictures. This also prevents your arms from getting tired and then you can use both hands if you need to stabilize your phone.
3.Finally, don’t forget your face
I know you have a good smile. But for some reason, the minute you have to take the picture while also being in it, you forget that you look slightly ill. Don’t worry, there is an easy fix to this. Before you snap that almost perfect selfie, look at yourself before you hit the button. This will ensure that your face is how you want it, and I don’t have to guess if you’re actually happy.
Don’t take this as a request to stop taking selfies. Your tweets are some of the simple joys I get throughout the day. But if you want to be like the cool kids, improve your game, Jay.