The Bachelor franchise has always been ridiculous. You put someone in a position of near infinite dating power for two months, then pressure them into a proposal with one of two people they’ve fallen in love with.

All of the sudden, you’re not on vacation all the time, you go from making out with twenty-some people to just one, and you know there’s someone out there who you’re in love with who’s constantly provoking that grass-is-greener doubt. How do you expect that sort of relationship to last in the real world?

The answer: you don’t expect it to work. The Bachelor is a fantasy mess. So, of course, the most fantastical and messiest installment of the Bachelor — Bachelor in Paradise — is by far the best the franchise has to offer.

Over the course of three weeks (THREE WEEKS!), contestants fly to a Mexican beach resort to join an insane dating pool. Alcohol is omnipresent, and no one — least of all each contestant — knows how to define the relationships that are formed. In the end, it’s somehow expected that at least two couples will get engaged.

Then there’s the game-esque structure that provokes drama. Each week, either each girl will choose one guy to save from a surplus of guys, sending all the excess home, or the guys will have the power to do the same to the girls. Producers constantly introduce new contestants to disrupt relationships almost as soon as they are formed, leaving these ‘rose ceremonies’ as centers of confusion, desperation, and chaos.

Of course, if you’re already watching, you know all of this. But regardless of whether or not you can sing the show’s opening theme “Almost Paradise” by heart (which I’m truly tempted to type out in caps here), here are our definitive Sunflower Power Rankings. This week, the girls are giving away the roses, so they’re generally higher on the list — each of them is guaranteed at least one more episode’s worth of safety. Yet each contestant’s security beyond that point — and their power to make, break and shake up relationships — varies greatly.

SUNFLOWER POWERHOUSES

1. Jenna

Analysis: Jenna is a beacon of energy with focus, resilience, and unlimited charm. She’s already proven she can navigate relationships with grace, and that many of the contestants — even those who she’s not dating — can’t help but smile when she’s around. She’s got both Benoit and Jordan to choose from, and both seem focused on establishing exclusive relationships with her. Even in a worst-case scenario, Jenna could probably build something up from ground zero with another contestant in whatever time is left.

Entertainment Factor: 7.5

2. Kendall

Analysis: Kendall’s in a similar situation to Jenna where she has two definitive options — hair-icane Leo and Grocery Joe. She’s got composure, charm and a unique personality that has drawn her a lot of attention, and Joe’s affection for her specifically is unwavering. If she chooses him, she’s a safe bet to run it to the end. It’s also possible that she could end up back with John if everything goes truly haywire. The only thing putting her below Jenna is that she doesn’t seem quite as versatile and resilient, and according to previews, she’s headed into a bit more of a hairy situation than Jenna will have to deal with.

Entertainment Factor: 7

3. John

Analysis: It’s hilarious, in admittedly a sad way (race and gender stereotyping, anyone?), how all the white jock bros of Bachelor are continuously surprised by how popular John is with the ladies. He’s an absolutely chiseled, self-made financial giant with excess kindness and self-assurance who takes “too good for this show” to an extreme. Right now, he’s in with one of the best catches in paradise, and he has quite a few other possibilities still waiting in the wings. His composure and depth of personality are likely to generate interest from other contestants over time. What a great name for a great guy.

Entertainment Factor: 7.5

SAFE FLOWERS

4. Astrid & 5. Kevin

Analysis: Astrid and Kevin are in similar places, but this week, Astrid has the power, so she’s got a slight edge. The couple seems strong, though they don’t get much screen time, and both are intelligent, beautiful people who could definitely make moves if they found themselves in trouble. Kevin has more history on the island, so to speak, but that means Astrid has more fresh options, and it’s not difficult to imagine her hitting it off with some of the quieter, sleeper picks on the island. Either way, they’re both super likeable, and for now, neither seems like they’re going anywhere.

Entertainment Factor: Astrid – 8.5 (level-headed speaker of wisdom!). Kevin – 7.

6. Tia

The annoying swinging ship (I only want to date you! Well, I’m not sure! You broke my heart! OK let’s date! OK, it’s official!) of Tia and Colton’s relationship has hopefully come to a stop for now. If Colton had been given the freedom to date around instead of being locked into a relationship with a girl he had the equivalent of a short fling with, he would probably be a bit higher — he’s perfectly suited for paradise and was receiving plenty of attention from fresh faces. Tia’s right to be frustrated by his wishy-washiness and has now claimed victory by locking him down for the duration of the show. It seems quite obvious that this is the sort of temporary, situational fantasy relationship that The Bachelor tends to crank out. It’s probably going to last through the duration of the show, then come crashing down with a series of passive aggressive social media posts in its wake.

Entertainment Factor: 2

7. Angela

Angela gets barely any screen time, but she’s dating one of the most laid-back, loyal people on the show, and she’s definitely drawn attention from many of the guys in paradise. She might not be in the spotlight, but that’s probably a good thing — no news for Angela and Eric is probably good news.

Entertainment Factor: 6

8. Jubilee

Jubilee is a tough person to place. She has a composed personality with a lot of depth that seems like she either connects deeply with a partner or doesn’t at all. It seems like she has a good connection with John, but the couple hasn’t gotten all that much screen time, so it’s difficult to tell. If that relationship breaks, it’s not clear who Jubilee would want to form a connection with; she hasn’t been around for long and we haven’t seen her with anyone else. Here’s to hoping that being an overall badass keeps her around much longer than her last stint at Paradise.

Entertainment Factor: 6.5

9. Colton

Tia told him to be straight with her about his emotions. Hopefully he doesn’t have too many if he wants to stick around.

Entertainment Factor: 3

TOUGH SOIL

10. Krystal

Who would have thought that Krystal would be so laid back and entertaining at Paradise? Everything positive about Krystal — her humor, charm and queenlike confidence — is intact while the annoying, competitive nature and fake voice have vanished completely. She’s made quite a few moves this go around, and she’s unfortunately landed on the worst option at her disposal in Chris. Chris isn’t the most stable of contestants, and if that falls apart, she could definitely find her way into a different and inevitably better relationship. For now, she’s in a semi-precarious position quite honestly beneath her grade.

Entertainment Factor: 8

11. Eric

Eric’s a wonderful, laid-back guy who seems like the perfect best friend. It was almost perfect for his season of The Bachelorette, but it destroyed him in Bachelor: Winter Games — he forms romantic relationships slowly, with a good foundation of friendship, which doesn’t bode well in these pressure-cooker reality television scenarios. This time around, he seems to have struck gold with Angela, a similarly kind-hearted person who seems to appreciate him from the little we see of her. If that doesn’t end up working out, thought, Eric is gone — he just doesn’t have the time to get back in the game.

Entertainment Factor: We miss Eric. Please more Eric.

12. Kenny

Kenny is a smooth son of a gun and consistently underestimated by both the women and men. However, most of his options have either moved on to other contestants or been kicked off the show. Right now, he’s with Annaliese, whose nervousness and urgency make her difficult to read. It’s not clear whether the couple is a good fit, and it’s definitely not clear if either Kenny or Annaliese has anywhere to go if it falls apart.

Entertainment Factor: 8.

13. Chelsea

Chelsea is confusing. Is she with David? What’s going to happen when Leo leaves? It seems like she’s destined to be the new Amanda — way too gorgeous and collected to be single, yet unable to find /choose a relationship that works for her. Hopefully we don’t see too much more of you around, Chelsea.

Entertainment Factor: 8.

14. Annaliese

The new Annaliese — self-aware, able to laugh at herself, relatively resilient — is so refreshing after watching her on Arie’s season. However, she still seems to have trouble establishing connections and being confident in her relationships. It’s not that Kenny and Annaliese couldn’t work out, it’s that we don’t really have any evidence to believe that they will, or should.

Entertainment Factor: 5

WILTING

15. Benoit

Benoit is great — kind, passionate, warm, a ray of brightness — and kind of the introverted version of Jenna, really. But he’s come in so late in the game that a decision that would normally be easy to make (Benoit over Jordan) is clouded by history and time constraints. It would be kind of ridiculous to see him engaged after a week, especially right after he got engaged on the Bachelor: Winter Games. Also, Jordan probably has the producers on his side. Benoit is adorable, but Jordan delivers more than half (conservative estimate) of the show’s laughs. He’s running against the odds; the only thing that’s keeping him around is Jordan’s incredible ability to shoot himself in the foot.

Entertainment Factor: 8.5

16. Joe

The weekly preview really makes it look like Kendall is choosing Joe over Leo, but right now, Kendall is definitely feeling Leo over Joe. If that’s the case, Joe will leave, because he is too pure and wonderful for this sad, sad state of affairs. He’s already being torn apart by her interest in Leo, and his response is to, adorably, hope it rains during their date. Seriously, the man is an angel. But is he Kendall’s angel? Maybe not.

Entertainment Rating: 8.5

17. David

David is with Chelsea or something, right? If he left, it would be such a non-event that I wouldn’t be surprised if they didn’t show his limo ride home. His role in this season is just to annoy Jordan, but not even in a way that’s fun to watch. Hopefully, this is the last we see of him.

Entertainment Rating: 1.5

18. Chris

I don’t get how people can talk about expecting Jordan to be Zoolander and forget to mention that Chris basically is Zoolander, except way more of a jerk. I guess Chris is with Krystal right now, but Krystal is known to go wherever she pleases, and its only a matter of time before she realizes how Chris is a gaslighting loser who is the last person you would want to have as part of your family. Amazing how Krystal has become the good guy here — at least Chris was good for that, I guess.

Entertainment Rating: 2

DONEFLOWERS

19. Leo

Leo is a hurricane of hair. If he wasn’t such a thirsty turd, he could easily keep five women in his back pocket at all times and bounce from relationship to relationship. Instead, he got off of a great date and immediately bounced off for another makeout session. Normally, hot jerks (*cough* Josh Murray *cough*) do well on Paradise, but Leo doesn’t seem to understand the rules of the game — you can’t be that obvious of a jerk or you’ll hurt people’s feelings. It’s incredible how someone who walks in and causes half the cast to nearly fall out of their chairs in hair-mazement can be at such risk for getting booted in their very first rose ceremony, yet here we are. If the weekly previews are anything to believe, Kendell’s going to be facepalming very soon and thanking the dear lord for Joe until the end of Paradise.

Entertainment Rating: I’m conflicted about this one. Is this where you separate the art from the artist? 9

20. Jordan

Jordan has an intense, unique, incredibly entertaining personality. He takes Paradise by the horns and is living the extremes — friends, enemies, one relationship with a very conservative partner and one with an extremely energetic partner. And now, he adds to that list having extremely rude, character-revealing outbursts in situations that don’t come close to warranting them. Jenna is smart enough to realize that, reality show or not, Jordan’s outburst is a nasty look into what is probably an anger issue and inconsideration for others. Jenna and Jordan have had a lot of fun together, but now that Jordan has snapped, I’d be shocked to see Jenna deny herself the opportunity to move onto a safer, fresher, and similarly passionate choice. It’s a huge bummer for viewers as Jordan is 90% of what makes this season fun to watch, but I wouldn’t count on him surviving this rose ceremony. Hopefully, Jordan is true to his word and tries to change for the better so he can come back for another season. I miss him already.

Entertainment Rating: 10