Mr. Advice Man is on the job

Dear Mr. Advice Man, I’ve been told that I need to list salary requirements on my resume. I have no idea how much to ask for. I don’t want to get short-changed, but I don’t want to price myself out of a job, either. How do you recommend I handle this thorny issue? – Salivating Over Salaries

Dear Salivating, the first thing you have to ask yourself is “Does this job involve wearing a nametag or paper hat?” If the answer is no, I suggest you take whatever they’re offering.

 


Dear Mr. Advice Man, I’m just about to complete my degree in comparative Russian literature with a minor in Medieval Accounting Practices. Do you have any advice that will help me get ahead in my first job? – Fyodor, Alexei, Dmitri, and Ivan CPA, LLC

Dear Karamazov Bros, always remember that Mr. Advice Man wants you to hold the pickle, and that he prefers large fries. Also, never try to secretly stick Mr. Advice Man with a Diet Coke – he sees right through that.

 


Dear Mr. Advice Man, I’ve been trying to increase my professional networking contacts by contacting alumni from my undergraduate program. I haven’t been getting a lot of responses. Anything I can do to make my letter seem more interesting? – Collapsed Correspondence

Dear Collapsed, while a letter written in crayon that declares, “I want to be the very best, like no one ever was,” is very enthusiastic, it is not very professional (unless that profession is Pokémon trainer). Furthermore, I suggest a different closing. “Lots of love, XOXOXO,” can come off a little awkward.