High-flying propaganda invasion hits WSU campus

Let’s be honest: birds are real. Or are they?

Recently, flyers have been springing up all over the Wichita State campus stating that “Birds aren’t real.” These flyers are a part of the Birds Aren’t Real movement.

The movement is based around facts regarding the bird population decline over the years. The organization’s website refers to multiple different occasions where the government tested out different surveillance tactics, making devices that resembled our feathered friends in the sky. The people of the movement simply believe biologic birds no longer exist.

According to the Birds Aren’t Real website, 99.5 percent of the general public still believe in real birds. This comes off as a shock to the members of the movement. They believe it is their duty to remove the blindfolds from the eyes of the people and welcome them in the light of the truth. Well, what they believe is the truth.

This soaring revolution that the Bird Brigaders are forming makes the flat Earth and JFK conspiracies look like a child playing in the McDonald’s Play Place. The leaders of the movement want this to be the most highlighted conspiracy this world has ever seen.

Members of the movement are part of the Bird Brigade, according to their website. The Bird Brigade has social media accounts in other states and even in Australia. However, the state of Kansas is not listed anywhere on the site. With flyers being put up around campus, this could mean the beginning of a statewide push of activism. This is most likely just the beginning of something new to follow along the prairie.

Yes, the government was a factor in the extinguishing of over 12 billion birds between 1959 and 1971. However, that is all that happened with those events, and there was no knowledge of government corruption involved in the mass genocide of these aeronautical creatures.

Richard Nixon may have created a fleet of surveillance devices that he called “birds,” back in 1978, but the overall purpose of the revolution has no significant correlation with actual substantial evidence. Therefore, the purpose of this movement is definitely raising awareness about the population decline of birds but is simply overexaggerated propaganda of government corruption.

Next time a bird flies by, you can decide what the truth is for yourself. If you look into the eyes of a bird and you see flashing red lights, then you might want to take caution. However, don’t be alarmed when things get a little “hawkward” because technically they did warn us.