Peace out, my fellow Shockers! I will be embarking on a new adventure this semester as I study abroad at the University of Chester in England.

 

I’ll be stepping on the plane this Friday and will return home the weekend before Christmas.

I’m pretty excited and a little nervous. I’m not worried about the flight over there, because I’ve been to Europe twice already — once in high school and once with the college I used to attend — so that part should be a breeze.

It’s the goodbyes at the airport I’m the most worried about. I will be leaving behind my family, fiancé, best friends and Chipotle (that alone is enough to make anyone cry) for the next three months. It will be the second hardest goodbye I will ever give.

The hardest goodbye I ever gave already happened this summer — I had to say goodbye to my father.

On the evening of July 21, I got a phone call from my mom telling me I needed to come home, because there had been an emergency.  

As I sped from Hillside to Maize Road, I pleaded with any and all divinities that my sisters, their husbands and my dad were all OK.

You see, I had all but ruled out that something had happened to my sisters or my dad. Mom would’ve never kept her voice so steady if something happened to one of my sisters.  I mean what parent could have? And she would’ve told me to go to the hospital if something had happened to Dad.

So I convinced myself that something must have happened to one of my brother-in-laws.

The thought never even crossed my mind that perhaps, whoever was at the root of this emergency, could already be gone.

I came home to discover that my father, despite being a borderline vegan and in good shape, had suffered a heart attack so massive that he died almost instantly and with probably no pain.

The last two months have been filled with tears, mood swings, anger and every other negative emotion you can think of.  In fact, I had decided to cancel my study abroad trip all together.  But at the insistence of my mom, sisters, fiancé, friends, aunts and uncles, I decided to go after all.  My dad would have wanted that.

As I get ready to board the plane Friday, I will give my second hardest goodbye. I will be saying goodbye to the people that have given me the most love and support these last two months in exchange for people and places I have yet to meet.

Most importantly, though, I’m hoping to say goodbye to the pain of these last two months and discover some inner peace for myself.

So goodbye, fellow Shockers.

Wish me luck.